Two months ago, we published a story titled "Addicted to the bad marriage" (Living March 29, 2006). In it, three women, Miriam, Purity and Rose were married to alcoholics and led miserable lives because of it. But none could walk out. The story elicited a huge response from readers, including one recovering alcoholic who identified with everything these women were going through. He says that in many cases, wives create an enabling environment for their alcoholic husbands and must seek help first before seeking it for their husbands. "If your husband refuses, then go ahead and get a life," is his advice.

Below is one of the responses that were recieved and printed by the Editor of Living Magazine in the Daily Nation newspaper in thwe issue of June 14, 2006

Alcoholics are to blame

I refer to your artcile about alcoholism (Living, May 24). It was an eye opener, especially for families living with alcoholics. But one thing I disagreed with is the issue of placing blame on the family, especially the wife, for encouraging the victims. Life is a matter of choices. We make choices on how we want to lead our lives. Therefore, if a person chooses to become alcoholic, he has no one to blame but himself.

Fiona, via e-mail

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